Then you have to test your hypothesis through observation. I observed at the time that my theory was too narrow: all boys are silly, not just the ones with brown hair. I remember my paper came back from the teacher with the comment "Its not just boys ..." written in red ink (next to the A+). Yes, my teacher was female. At the time, I wasn't sure if she meant that girls, too, are silly, or that boys remain silly even as grown ups. Knowing Ms. Johnson, probably both.
For absolutely no reason that I can think of, I decided the other day (now that I'm all grown up and still silly) to have another go with the scientific method. I sat there in my favorite coffee shop enjoying my beverage of choice and doing some people-watching. I looked around and realized that more than half the patrons were reading something. Some were doing it the old-fashioned way, with actual paper newspapers and books, while others were getting their word fix electronically. The coffee shop is one of the more 'highbrow' ones where a single order can take five minutes to recite: "I'll have a tall, skinny half caff latte, with a shot of espresso, no water, no foam, extra hot, in a mug, not a cup...". My theory was that these discerning drinkers (well, it IS my favorite coffee shop, so I have a bias) with their wordy orders would choose to read books or newspapers no less wordy. No light fiction for these picky patrons. It would be War and Peace, or The Biology and Habitat of South African Invertebrates (unabridged edition) all the way. There are more universities in a 15 mile radius of this coffee shop than you can shake a book at. No US News & World Report for these news hounds. No, the businessmen in here would be hiding behind the Wall Street Journal or the New York Times.
So, with my hypothesis formed: 'patrons of Highbrow Coffee Shop (no, I'm not telling you the name of the coffee shop - I like to drink in anonymity) have highbrow reading tastes,' I cruised my cappuccino around the shop and peeked at paper and eyeballed electronics. After several rounds, and some strange looks, I sat back down, chagrined.
While a few patrons were reading tomes big enough to warm a large family of non-readers for a whole evening of book-burning, many were not. There was a distinguished older gentleman that I swear was reading Fifty Shades of Gray. He was probably 'holding' it for his wife (snort). There was the group of young people sitting together sharing a laptop on which I was sure I would see something that would make me feel the need to wash my eyeballs afterwards. Nope, they were checking out the class schedule for that South African Mammals class (or some such) at the local university. There was the office woman having her 'five minute drink' at the counter while reading what looked like a book of Japanese anime. She was hunched over that thing like she thought someone was going to rip it away from her. The businessmen were reading an assortment of newspapers, not just the ones with small print and few pictures. I'm sure a saw a guy with a British newspaper, turned to page three. (If you don't know what normally appears in British newspapers on page three, ask a Brit.) And so it went.
My theory was blown right out of the expensive cappuccino (in a cup, not a mug please). Patrons in highbrow coffee shops read the same trove of trash and treasure as everyone else. And whatever they read is sure to be a treasure to them. I don't think Ms. Johnson would have given me an A+ for this test of the scientific theory. That's probably her son over there furtively reading Fifty Shades of Gray. All grown up and gray himself now. She was right, though. It's not just boys who are silly.
Maybe I'll go hang out at the Dunkin Donuts on the other side of town and see what people over there are reading.
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